Can you feel it?

So I was talking to my friend the other day about something that I now can't remember. If made to describe him in one sentence, I would sum him up as cynic. That’s right, that’s the sentence. I understand that technically, that isn’t a sentence based on the rules of literature, but rules were meant to be broken. But he is probably the hardest person to read. I feed off of emotions other people give me. If they give me sad, I’ll console, if they give me happy, I’ll smile, If they give me mad, I’ll cower and apologize, or perhaps go crazy black woman on them, depending on the person.

But this person gives me nothing. I can’t tell if he’s displeased on pleased unless he’s yelling at me or laughing. It’s not that he never shows emotion, it’s that there doesn’t seem to be any transition between them. Granted, I only see him for a short period each day, but when I do see him or talk to him, that’s what I get.

I was talking to him about emotions the other night. We are two very different people, and sometimes I wonder what he sees in me, how can he be friends with someone so completely different than him. I usually come to the conclusion that he really hates me, but puts up with me because he actually has one of the most admirable emotions, compassion. But anyway, not important. I would say I am a fairly dramatic person. All of my emotions are exaggerated. When I’m happy, you’ll know it, and when I’m pissed, it’s obvious too.

Now, I don’t think everyone needs to show the same emphases in their own emotions because then we would just have a bunch of Tamaras running around, and no one wants that. But I also don’t believe that we should hide our emotions. In his post, my friend says that he has self control, so he can handle his emotions. What does that even mean, to handle one’s emotions. That’s wrong, that goes against nature. Emotion is a reaction, you are suppose to react.

“Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions.”

David Borenstein quotes

I understand that this all probably means nothing coming from someone who has little to no self control, but still. Emotions have been given a bum rap. They are a sign of weakness, a disability. They are a sign of one who lacks self control. But I don’t buy that shit. Emotions are probably the only pure thing humans have, and I for one don’t want that taken away from me. They allow a person to think. By interpreting your emotions, you’re allowed to decide what action to take. I’m not saying that they’re without their problems. I get that a person can’t react based solely on emotion, but you shouldn’t act without it either.

peace.